"What need is there to weep over parts of life? The whole of it calls for tears. New ills will come, or old ones will return. Meanwhile, keep your spirit cheerful." - Epictetus, Discourses
The other day, my daughter was stressed about some complicated logistical stuff happening two days in the future. She was visibly distraught and trying to figure out what to be prepared for in case it all went badly. I am not great at this myself, but I reminded her that tomorrow’s troubles don’t require your negative energy today. Lighten up.
Seneca wrote in one of his "Letters to Lucilius” that, "We are tormented by what is to come more than by what is. The future is uncertain, and we often suffer more in imagination than in reality." That is to say, we go over scenarios for how badly something could go, it causes us suffering, and then it comes, and it wasn’t really that bad.
Then we laugh. What was I so worried about?
There’s a balance between planning for all eventualities (being prepared) and suffering in advance of imagined problems. You’re planning a hike and need to prepare for the possibility of rain and sleet, so you pack a rain jacket and the appropriate shelter. You don’t get into a huff about weather that hasn’t come yet. That’s silly.
When it’s all said and done, though, and you realize you’ve been wound tight over imagined struggles that never even came about, feel free to have a laugh about it. Don’t take yourself so seriously, or even this messy life.
If you want to go a bit deeper on humor and leadership and when to laugh it off, check out this video above. It’s exclusive to newsletter subscribers before it hits YouTube later this week.
Be well.
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