Stop and smell the roses (or BBQ)
Dispatch from Texas, gratitude and slowing down
Getting out on the road is always such a nice way to hit the reset button. You get to see new things and expand your perspective on the way people live outside of your usual day-to-day. I’ve been in Texas for 3 days for the occasion of May 4th, a little mini-Star Wars holiday that fans worldwide celebrate, by doing some book talks in Austin and Dallas, TX (May the Fourth Be With You). A wonderful social organization you should get involved with, America’s Future, hosted me in both cities to speak to members about How The Force Can Fix The World. We discussed political polarization, balance in an imbalanced time, the Supreme Court, and making time in your life for more joy.
I was sitting next to this man on the shuttle at Dulles Airport outside of Washington, DC. I don’t remember why we were talking, but when I mentioned I was going to Texas for work he said to me, “I used to travel a lot for work. I wish I had taken more time to actually see the places they sent me.”
He, like me, had tunnel vision when it came to travel. “I am here for this purpose, and I will singularly focus on this thing and go home.” This is how I’ve traveled for many, many years. It kind of bothered me what he said. So when I landed in Austin, TX, I decided to try something different.
The old adage is to, ‘stop and smell the roses’. It’s about gratitude. When you move through life like it’s an objective-based game, you’re setting yourself up for endless frustration because of the inevitable potholes that will appear in your path. It’s like this in large-scale video games too. Sure, you can play the story missions and lose your temper losing boss battles in the game….Or, you can explore the world the game makers made for you. “Convince yourself that everything is the gift of the gods,” Marcus Aurelius once wrote in his journals.
Meaning, try to see the benevolence and good in everything that happens in your journey. In Aurelius’ life, he lost 9 children at various ages and his wife of 35 years. Always keep perspective.
So anyways, while in Texas I decided to pause and observe where I was for a change, to break my habit of endless work and “productivity.” More on productivity later. Between Austin and Dallas, I took time to go see the small town of Bastrop and shop in a store I’ve long wanted to visit.
I got a full breakfast at an esteemed local spot, Maxines, instead of my usual preference of a cheap grab n’ go at Dunkin Donuts. It was lovely. My primary point of gratitude eating there was that there were these two old men sitting at the table next to me, and one was counseling the other on how to build a home in the middle of nowhere. This is something I think about a lot. He was explaining the rules for shooting guns in neighborhoods in this part of Texas, how to pick a good plot of land, and all sorts of weird stuff. It was great. I appreciated getting this little window into life in rural Texas that I wouldn’t have gotten in the drive-thru for a bacon egg & cheese.
After leaving the breakfast place, I saw a barber shop across the street. My hair was out of control and I normally always just wait for a good time to stop into Great Clips for a cheap cut. Have you noticed I’m kinda cheap? So I walked in and they squeezed me in for a haircut. In that 30 minutes, I heard a remarkable story (albeit criminal) from my barber about his roommate was currently on the run from police because a man stole his boat over a financial dispute, and his roommate in response….stole the other guy’s DOG. I hope everyone is gonna be okay???
There’s no lesson here. It was just wild, is all. But my barber was a happy, highly talented guy, who lives a life that bears no resemblance to mine. Hearing about that, seeing it, slowing down to experience it, that’s a worthwhile expenditure in the grand scheme of things.
Once I got to Dallas, I made a point to drop by Glenn Beck’s studio (TheBlaze). They’ve all been very good to me there and supportive of my work. Stu Burguiere, the host of Stu Does America, kindly hosted me on his show for a segment. We talked about my book the Supreme Court a bit. I don’t feel like it was my best performance talking about this stuff. I felt a tad scatterbrained. But you know what, practice practice practice. It was a great warm-up for the book talk I was preparing to give to an audience that evening.
When I got to the venue in Dallas, I spent an hour by the river reading a book, not toiling over my speech. It cleared my head. Over-preparation is real, and can be counterproductive and anxiety-inducing for me. Are you one of those people, too?
Like I told myself about how I’d behave on this trip to Texas (to slow down) I sat by the river and recommitted myself to speaking slowly during my remarks. Not getting frenzied and carried away in rhetoric and improvisation. This is a weakness of mine. And you know what? It helped a lot. The book talk went great. I chose my words carefully, moved at a measured pace, and made a clear point.
Today I did a pretty important thing, which was to go to Hurtado BBQ. This place is one of those joints that on any day when it opens at 11AM, there will be a line around the block. My personality being what it is, I tend to avoid these kinds of places and go for simplicity. Applebees or something. No, I’m not joking. As expected, this BBQ and brisket was out of this world good. I ate a lot and decided to walk it off in historic downtown Arlington, Texas.
Because the food had made me sleepy, I started to head back to the car to get to the airport early…..six hours early…….(I’m that guy). Then I saw a really lovely patch of grass and a tree shading the ground on a beautiful, breezy 85-degree day. Damnit, I laid down under that tree and took a nap. It was glorious. Because I took that time under that tree, I’ve had a better day. I also saw from under that tree, a rock climbing gym. Climbing is my hobby, and trying out a new gym in a new city is a rare opportunity. So I did that too! Honestly, the gym kinda stunk though, and you know what? It made me even more grateful for the great gym we have in Manassas, VA where we climb and hang out with friends made on those walls.
Stop and smell the roses. Or sleep under that tree. You have time. If you really don’t, then make time.
What I’m grateful for as I sit in DFW Airport waiting to go home
The friendship network my family has built at the climbing gym near our home. It’s not only a great gym with cool walls, but the people have made our lives so, so much better.
For all of you. Everyone who picked up How The Force Can Fix The World. It is such a blessing to get to travel halfway across the country to talk to people about Star Wars Episode I….it’s a weird life I’m living. But it’s incredible and I’m having such fun making people smile about Star Wars while engaging on political issues.
My wife and mother. Mother’s Day is around the corner. My Mom watched my child this week while I was away, and my amazing wife was doubling down on her final exams for school. She is getting her Bachelors. Kind, patient and gracious women. I love them and couldn’t do what I do without them.
What are you grateful for? Reflect on it, write it down, tell a loved one. It’s a powerful practice to go the extra step beyond just thinking it. Try it.
This is the way.
Man, don't ever try to cook a brisket if you don't know what your are doing. The thing will come out tough as a saddle and cut like seasoned oak. Texans know how to cook it right.